The heavy sense of discovery and adventure normally associated with researching generations of the Roberts family is, on occasion, fraught with circumstances sufficiently frustrating as to nudge Gandhi to violence. Such is the case currently, as I have encountered a nine-month gap in Edmund C. Roberts’ account of his historic voyage of discovery. In April, 1913, his funds were restricted as a consequence of two villains tampering with his communications to his bankers, resulting in his being refused credit at the coaling station in San Francisco. As the narrative in my possession resumes in late December with the young adventurer afloat in the Baci Finale under a full head of steam and a thousand miles distant, leads one to conclude there was a resolution to his crisis.
Most irritating is the fact that I know where the missing journal entries may be found: They may be found for the simple reason I engaged (as always) the research firm of Finders & Keepers, Ltd., London to locate them, which they did. They then, however decided the increasing interest in the Roberts family generated by the publishing of the Roberts family’s illustrations and writings warrants them (Finders & Keepers, Ltd., London — read; Binders and Fleecers) to demand an outrageous multiplying of their already ludicrous rate of remuneration. Their last communication reads (taunts): “Well, old chap, it appears you are wedged in a bit of a tight spot; we have that which you requested, yet you remain puckish regarding our modest monetary bump.” So, until our stalemate is resolved we’ll just skip those nine months and continue before outright hostilities ensure.
December 25, 1913 – Edmund C. Roberts was alone in his diving apparatus (for reasons no doubt explained in the missing journal entries) when he sighted a Sea Maiden celebrating the Holiday.
His journal reads:
The previous months have been so challenging, I could spit. I have therefore embraced solitude and consequently been rewarded: Most beautiful Sea Maiden observed adrift in quiet contemplation, a sea star held over her, a reverential expression on her face. I have named her “Virginia” for obvious and other reasons. Maidenous Noelicus, red hair, well formed torso.